Vegetarian Mee Krab (Sweet Crispy Noodles)

Also: Mee Krob, Mekrab, Mekrob

Contrary to the famous words spoken by our friend, Eric Cartman - ("You know, that stuff you can get as an appetizer at Thai Food restaurants? Mee krob, dude, it's WAY grosser than sh*t. I'd scarf down a whole wet bucket full of sh*t before I ate another plate of mee krob.") - this is a terrific dish, with an explosion of unique flavors. I can assure you that this version does not taste anything like the aforementioned fecal matter...

8 oz. rice vermicelli noodles, uncooked
oil, for deep frying
2 cups
2 eggs
4 TB pickled garlic, thinly sliced
4 TB shallots, thinly sliced
1 cup bean sprouts
4 scallions, thinly sliced
Thai red chilis, thinly sliced
Cilantro sprigs

For sauce:
1 TB tomato paste
2 TB soy sauce or vegetarian fish sauce
2 TB palm sugar
2 TB lime juice
1 TB tamarind water

Break the noodles into small lengths. Heat the oil to 375 degrees and begin dropping noodles into the hot oil (a little bit at a time). They will puff up and brown almost immediately. Remove from hot oil and place on paper towels to drain. Repeat until all noodles are fried. Beat eggs and drizzle into hot oil to form a cooked ribbon of egg. Remove egg from fryer and chop. Add tofu to fryer and fry until golden brown. Remove tofu and drain on paper towels.

Add 1 TB oil to a wok or pan and heat. Fry pickled garlic and shallots for 1 minute. Add tofu to pan and stir. Cook 1 more minute and remove from pan.

Combine sauce ingredients and stir to dissolve sugar.

Place a pile of crispy rice noodles on a plate, topping with a little bit of the fried egg and the tofu mixture. Spoon sauce over dish and garnish with bean sprouts, sliced chilis, scallions, and cilantro.